140

147!

To those who come here, I'm 149 now and eating 450 cals/day and exercising 800 cals/day. I always do cardio, strength training, and yoga whether I have time to or not.

So, I just wanted to let anyone know who clicks on my name that I'm not as enormous as I was in that last entry. I am currently 151 and eating under 500 calories a day and working out at least 750 calories. I know I'm still a fat ass but it's not as bad as my first post.

I'm new. I used to be a model and now I'm fat. My boyfriend of 8 years and I started a weight loss competition between eachother in January. He went from 215 to 180 and is still losing weight without starving himself. My standards are higher for myself though. I haven't lost near as much weight as him. I'm 5'5" and when I was modeling I weighed 115 lbs, which may sound like a lot to you guys, but I'd be fine with that. Now I'm like 165 and I want to get back down to my modeling weight before august. Today I'm fasting completely and John and I are going to the track later to run 100 meter repeats. I know I'm fatter than all of you, so please don't rub it in. I'm using zantrax 3 and fiber pills to feel full and i drink a lot of water, coffee and tea. I work at a coffee shop with a gourmet bread store attached to it, it smells so good and I've learned to enjoy the smells rather than the tastes. I have had some trouble sleeping, does anybody have any suggestions with that? I have also had troubles with my boyfriend being concerned about me, but I know he won't tell anyone about it, he just doesn't like it. It helps for me to watch shows about skinny celebrities, or really fat ones. Right now I'm watching True Life on MTV about obese people, it definately takes away from my hunger. Anyway, I've visited this site alot and I appreciate any support or advice or ideas. Thanks girls, I'm going to try to post my picture, but the last time I tried I could get it. Any instructions? Thank you all.